dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
