I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
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