i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize