I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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