OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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