Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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