I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.