dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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