is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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