thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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