So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
