4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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