Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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