Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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