I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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