you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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