My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
