The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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