Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
