so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
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My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
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I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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