his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
and you fell through a lawn chair
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