But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
