that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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