She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
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