And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
