I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
