I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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