hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
