Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
