so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
