I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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