I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
