the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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