Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
