I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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