Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
