Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize