operation harelip BJ is a go
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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