so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
