Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just took my morning after pill in the library
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
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sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
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I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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