hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
