A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
