Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
