Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
