Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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