would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
