i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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