i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
