as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
