Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
